I have been writing in a journal on an almost-daily basis since I was 17 years old. This is a record of me going through each entry from the beginning, and commenting on the me from fifteen years ago.

So, how do you hold your beast? Do you keep it in a cage and locked in the closet? Do you have it in a zoo, for all to see but not touch? Is it dept on a short chain at your side? Or is it on a leash, long enough so it may bite. Is your beast like mine? Free to run, but nowhere to go. Mine is quite the tame one, but it growls. It hungers for fleshy food and sweaty sustenance. I know that I can’t continue to hold it, Instead I caress it and embrace that beast. Man and Woman alike, all have beasts their own. But what I really want to know, Is how you are holding it and where, So that I might set it free.

Even though I know it isn’t the case, whenever I read my crappy poetry from 15 years ago, it always sounds like I’m alluding to something sexual. The ‘hungers for fleshy food and sweaty sustenance’ line especially makes it sound like I wanted to fuck the shit out of someone. Man, maybe that’s what I am talking about here. It’s completely out of character for me back then…and now. Still, though, what else can it be?