I have been writing in a journal on an almost-daily basis since I was 17 years old. This is a record of me going through each entry from the beginning, and commenting on the me from fifteen years ago.

Eighteen

     Graduate

          Explore

               Experience

                    Fantasy

                         Fade

The high of the prom didn’t last too long it seems. Here I am, back in suicidal mode again, literally illustrating my point if the words weren’t enough. I think this is basically how I saw my future. I’d turn eighteen, graduate, do something crazy, then end it. I think the reason for the bike being pictured with ‘Explore’ is that I planned to ride my bicycle out to one of the coasts. I never did it, but it’s still a goal of mine to do a coast to coast bicycle ride.

On a side note, the letters in pencil on the margin are FASERIP, and stand for Fighting, Agility, Strength, Endurance, Reason, Intuition and Psyche. These are the ability scores for making super heroes for the Marvel Comics role-playing game that we played all the time.