This is the first podcast that is filled with material not found on the Christmas tape. What Christmas tape? Don’t worry about it. Let’s talk about something else. When I was in Japan, I took a bus tour and the tour guide told me the Japanese have three religions - Buddhism, Shinto, and once a year they all become Christians so they can get presents. This is why the Japanese rule over everything. They’re smart. Shit, we’re talking about Christmas again. Let’s talk about something else. What are you getting me for Christmas?

INITIATE EPISODE FIVE

CONTENTS:

The Essentials - The Essentials The Essentials “Last Night I Spent My Money” (1990)

First most common place for a band to get their album cover picture taken – a field. Second most common place – inside or around a car (unless you’re a rap group, then it’s car first, a dirty street that represents ‘the hood’ second). The Essentials are the car kind. Which kind are you?
Xmal Deutschland - Fetisch Xmal Deutschland “Qual” (1983)

Say what you will about Germany, but you have to respect any culture that is always doing things that makes the rest of the world let out a collective ???? Then to top it all off, when you go to Germany and ask, “Seriously, what the fuck?” The country gives you one of those looks that means you’re lame for even having to ask.
Susan Christie “I Love Onions” (1966)

It hit the charts in ‘66, and then Susan Christie was never heard from again. Where’s the follow up hit? Where’s the full-length album? Hell, I’ll even settle for an EP. Just give me more, more, more!
Julee Cruise - Floating Into the Night Julee Cruise “Rockin’ Back Inside My Heart” (1989)

This album is like being on drugs. Considering that David Lynch wrote and produced it, that shouldn’t be much of a surprise. But for real, if you listen to this album, it will put you in an altered state of consciousness. Unfortunately, the high is inconsistent. It could make you relaxed, it could make you cry, it could make you happy. It’s pretty addicting, too!
Wireless - Positively Human, Relatively Sane Wireless “What You Make It” (1979)

These are the kinds of bands we need more of now. Four dudes (though I’m not opposed to dudettes doing the same) grabbing their instruments, hitting the stage and jamming out some rock n’ roll.
White Boys - ...On A Mission White Boys “We Live To Rock” (1988)

A book could be written about how unbelievably awesome this album is. Each chapter would be about one of the songs, and would describe in detail why the song is so cheesy, stereotypical, and the antithesis of hip-hop, and how you should know better than to keep listening, but how you can’t stop yourself. You can’t hate on the White Boys because they’re the total package. They perform with total conviction and purposefully rock their mullets without giving a damn what anybody thinks. They is like…on a mission, yo!